Friday, 19 June 2015

A cloudy lesson

Once upon a time there lived a boy and his grandfather.  His grandfather's name was Jacob and his name was Jax.

 Jacob took Jax to the roof of his house to make cloud's. First he took the cloud shaped hoop and set it up on the platform on his roof.


Jacob blew into the magical hoopand a cloud flew through  the other end then Jax tried and when he blew through the hoop one little cloud popped out.

Jax tried again and nothing happened.  He kept on trying but nothing happend so he lent over and broke it he stood up.

Jacob said are you okay and then Jax stood up. Jax looked at the magic circle and it was no longer a circle. Jax tried to strech it back into it's shape but made it worse.

Jax looked through the hoop at a cloud then he made a star and gave it to Jacob. Jacob blew into it and it made a star cloud.

Then he made a rabit and gave it to Jacob. He blew into it and it made a rabit. Jax made a hart and it made a hart cloud.

1 comment:

  1. I like how you broke this piece into paragraphs.

    I'm wondering if you have succeeded in our WALT and success criteria because I don't think I see any language features in this piece.

    ReplyDelete